Tips and Tricks with Patience: Surviving the holidays

Graphic by: Jacob Kunes

Graphic by: Jacob Kunes


We all have those annoying aunts, uncles, and grandparents that ask cliche questions every holiday during dinner.

Questions like, “Where are you going to college?” or “Why don’t you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?”

How about this, I DON’T KNOW.

What I usually do to handle these questions is very unique, you could say. As soon as my relatives start getting nosy I grab my meal, my phone, and some napkins and head to my room.

Occasionally, I lock the door and wait in there until they leave.

This is probably not a good way to handle the holidays. Considering the holidays are a time for love, laughter, and family, you should probably talk to your family at some point. Maybe.

Here are some tips on how to make it through without going crazy.

Don’t dress too casual, but don’t dress too nice either.

If you meet all your family without putting in some sort of effort they will assume that you’ve let yourself go and will try to help you “figure out your life.” Nobody needs that kind of negativity.

If you dress too formal they’ll think you’re handling your life better than you probably are. If they start to assume you’re doing well, they will get curious about your life. Curiosity turns into questions. Avoid questions at all costs.

If you can’t avoid questions, avoid straightforward answers.

For example, my aunt will probably ask me, “Patience, why don’t you have a boyfriend?” My response would be somewhere along the lines of, “It’s just me being me, but when’s dessert because pumpkin pie sounds good right about now.”

BAM, she’s out of my business. She’s probably dreaming about pie now, too.

Always have your phone on hand.

You are important. Maybe no one’s calling or texting you during break, but you could pretend. If you have your phone on you and you’re acting like you have a lot going on, your family will leave you alone. Who would interrupt you while you’re having an important conversation?

Volunteer to do the busy work

If you’re constantly cleaning or preparing and serving the food, your relatives will have less time to pester you with petty little questions.

I’d rather scrub 50 dishes than explain to my grandma why I’m still single.

Pretend to fall asleep after dinner, or actually fall asleep.

Just take a nap. It’s a good idea, trust me, If you eat as much as you should you’ll be stuffed and ready for a nap as is. If you’re not ready, eat some more food or pretend to be asleep. No one will want to wake you from your food coma.

As soon as your family is done celebrating, take a bath or a shower. You’ll need to relax after an eventful day like this. It’s always good to treat yourself, especially after being examined and questioned by your relatives. 

Patience Jurgens